Text and Image Copyright Notice. Published under copyright by Loveawake España. © Copyright 2010-2020. All rights reserved.

I received an e-mail from a single woman who attends church regularly. This year she started noticing the men attending her church events.

One man attracted her so she decided to practice her flirting techniques with him. Well, she smiled and got no response. He wouldn’t even look at her. Then one night she walked next to him thinking he might look her way and say “hello”. But he didn’t. She’d never seen him with a woman. He was always alone. So she thought he was just shy.

Then one Sunday as she was selling baked goods, the man walked in…with a woman on his arm.

Ladies, when a man does not respond to you there are reasons.

So how can you tell if he’s REALLY interested in meeting you?

1. Signal Him By Smiling for 5 Seconds

Three seconds is polite. Four is not enough. Five gets attention.

Yes, it’s terrifying. Yes, you feel like you’re inviting him to molest you on the spot. Yes, your armpits are sweating and your lip gets stuck on your tooth…but do it anyway.

A man needs to know you’re interested before he feels safe enough to approach. Men who approach you without being signaled are usually drunks or nerds.

A man who walks across a room to speak to you after you’ve signaled him with a smile is DEFINITELY interested!

2. Don’t Speak First

If you see a man you’re interested in NEVER speak first (unless you want to pick him up, invite him out and pay for it.) (There’s nothing wrong with that…just be conscious.)

If you speak to a man first, not only does it set you up to pursue him…you don’t know if he’s REALLY interested in you or just being polite.

I know of a woman who met a man in a coffee shop. She approached him and said, “I don’t know if you’re married or not, but I think you’re cute.”

They began seeing each other and after a couple months, she found out he was indeed married.

When she questioned him, he said, “You told me when we met you didn’t care if I were married.”

Oooops! Imagine her surprise.

3. Don’t Take Rejection Personally

Sometimes you smile (or drop a handkerchief or trip him) and he just ignores you. When this happens, don’t take it personally. It’s true that he may not find you attractive…but it could be because he’s not available.

Maybe he’s married. Maybe he’s gay. Whatever.

Move on. Brush yourself off and smile at the next man you find appealing.